How I learned to hate my body

It’s been a few months since we got raw and real around the topic of body image in our kick-off Power Circle With Powerful Women series back in August with Tanya Lynn, Amanda Noelle and Nathalie Chapron and I wanted to reach out and continue the conversation that I know so many of us struggle with.  

Ever since I hit puberty, I remember feeling uncomfortable with my body.

Part of this was due to what I learned from my mother around her body and weight struggles over the years and part came from just what happens to a little girl during those formative years.

The real kicker for me was when my mother took me aside in private to tell me not to worry about my boobs because one day, she would help me get a boob job.  I was probably 13 or 14 at the time.

What was a well-meaning gesture from my mother at the time, because she grew up hating the size of her breasts, turned out to be nearly a life long challenge for me.

From then on I became obsessed with my body and boobs. I began to feel incredibly insignificant as a woman because of, dare I say, how I looked and the size of my breasts and thighs.

This is something that I have written about and shared extensively over the years and have since shifted significantly for myself. (if you’re new to this list and curious about those stories, you can read more here)

However, like any life long challenge, with every new level comes a new devil and over the summer, I was invited to be a part of Laura Hollick’s nü Icon movie.

The nü Icon movie is a vision quest experience shared with thousands of women around the world and I knew that by being a part of this incredible visual experience that I would gain some wide range exposure for myself and my work.

I was thrilled with the opportunity, but it also brought up my body image stuff because I knew I would be presented to the world in a very sexy and revealing way. (which isn’t required to be represented as a nü Icon, it’s a unique experience for everyone, but I already knew my essence well and had an idea of what would be revealed.)

Needless to say, I had no choice but to step in to the next level of my body love in a fierce and fabulous way.

And though it wasn’t easy… which I will share more of that story in tomorrow’s email, I found a whole new appreciation for my self and my body which was a huge rite of passage for me and my work.

Tune in tomorrow for the “Full Reveal” of my nü Iconic image that came from this work. Hint- it’s bold, sexy and very edgy for me… and in the meantime, I would love to begin a dialogue with you on this topic.  

Please share below in the comments…

1. What struggles do you have around loving your body?
2. What did you learn growing up about your body (good or bad)?
3. What practices do you have that help you love your body more? 

Here is a sneak peak of what I’m going to fully reveal to you tomorrow.